celestialfray: (No Airbanding)
[personal profile] celestialfray
Dammit, why can't I get hit on by cute college aged guys?  Why does it always have to be skeevy random people off the street?

I was walking down a local avenue and out of the corner of my eye, I see this car pass by with someone staring at me and then a honk. I think, Hey, maybe that was someone I knew. Oh well. Then the car pulled off to the side of the road (though not very close to me) and honked again.

I stood there for a moment, thinking, what the hell? No one else was around, the car was still running, as if expecting me to run over. I tenatively approached it, thinking it must have been someone I knew. As I got closer, I see it's this older guy with his head turned back staring at me, smiling (in kind of a "hey baby" way) and waving at me to come over.  And I'm just thinking "I have no idea who the hell you are and so I will be walking away." He then honked again until he realized I was not going back, and left.

What the hell? And this isn't the first time something like this has happened... This is actually like the 4th memorable time (3rd in the past few months) that some slightly skeevy guy has gone out of his way to hit on me in some random manner.


#3 - This wasn't that weird. Just skeevy. Happened while I was waiting for the bus.  He kept making small talk, asking questions. I tried not to engage him, but my headphones were obscured and the book I was actively reading not obvious enough. I was perfectly polite, giving short noncommital answers, until he was like "Would you like to go out to dinner?" I replied, "Man, this bus needs to hurry up" (because I actually didn't hear him...) and he asked again. I thus responded: "uh, sorry.." (Quite the wordsmith, am I) then drifted subtley away... He was probably about 30 years older than me, and he knew I was in college, so I was a little creeped out.


#2 At an interesection, a guy (with a green light) stopped, rolled down his window, and said in what sounded like the most stereotypically "gay" voice ever, "Oh my god, you are so beautiful. Can I give you my number?" I was flattered, but I also didn't know what to say.


#1 - I think I posted about this long ago, but let's just say this guy followed me for about 5 blocks (even waited as I walked into a store trying to lose him) trying to give me his number, all the while ignoring my direct "sorry, not interested" remarks, and saying that I shouldn't call the police or anything like that. He actually stayed with me until my bus came, which was not a fun 5 minutes.


Man, I don't get hit on a lot, but when I do, it's always in some really random fashion. And I'm always really creeped out by the manner in which it occurs. I really don't get it though. Is stopping random women on the side of the road really conducive to getting her number? Do girls find it flattering and worth pursuing?

Date: 2006-04-26 03:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] caille.livejournal.com
Very creepifying indeed.

I urge you to carefully think out a routine for handling these situations so that you don't tend to approach a guy in a car. You are being polite, but in situations like that, you are not required to be polite. I think you should probably refrain from being mean (unless your "uh-oh" feeling tells you to be mean), but look: if (long shot) it turns out to be a friend or acquaintance, they will totally forgive you for seeming standoffish, and they will be embarrassed about not having properly identified themselves.

For #2 and #3, a clear, firm "No, thank you" is enough. For someone trying to make small talk, you can say, "I'm sorry but I don't want to talk right now". Nothing more, no excuses.

For #3 - honey, that's stalking. If you want to stick to the courteous route, you need to say, "Please leave me alone. Stop following me. I mean it."

Don't be afraid to draw attention to yourself. In fact, your sense of propriety makes these guys think they can persist. Go into a store and say clearly to the clerk, "Do you mind if I hang out here for a minute? This man keeps following me and I don't like it." We're raised to be nice and helpful, but it can totally work against us in so many instances.

And you should practice more drastic reactions, in your head, so you're ready to deploy them if you need to. I suggest "Crazy Girl", which involves shrieking something like, "OMG, I can't believe you said that! Oh God, now it's all ruined! I have to start all over again, and there's no time. Why did you have to say that? It's ruined! Ruined, I tell you..." etc.

Or maybe simply, "Kenneth? Kenneth? What is the frequency!" You know. Open up a can of Insane-O on his ass.

Date: 2006-04-27 02:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beauty-that.livejournal.com
Hit 'em in the face!!!!!!

I know every time some random oldester pulls over in his '79 Pacer I'm way turned on...

mmm... baby got hatchback.


Seriously though, hit him... IN THE FACE>>>

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